Do you think he ever wonders what if?

Dear Ask 3 Guys,

Hey guys! I just found your website!! It's actually really cool! Every girl out there wants advice from actual guys! So yeah! It's going to be well recommended!

So, here's the scoop!..

I was with a man for a little over 2 years. He was my perfect everything. I loved him more than anything! I did practically everything he wanted. Needless to say, I was head over heels crazy in love with him. My parents did not like him; neither did most of my family, but I was determined to be with him, because I loved him so much.

Our relationship wasn't the strongest-- I admit! We always had our issues, but I know I helped him out in several ways. He returned to school for me.

We would break up all the time-- well, actually, he would break up with me, because "he didn't like a lot of things about me, and maybe I needed to change them". The relationship got so bad, there was even domestic violence involved. Yes, he hit me. Not all the time, but maybe a couple of times.

We went trough several things together. I knew he loved me, but I just didn't think he was committed.

So one time, we got into an argument, and he hit me. It got bad, so i decided to end it. I moved with my parents, (they lived in another country) so I basically left far!.. So, 3 months later he contacts me, says he is truly a changed man, wants to live the rest of his life with me, is so sad I left his side. There was probably more to that, but to make the story shorter, I left the country I was in! Literally left my house and went to go live with him. (this is the first time we lived together). So, everything was good, and we had less fights. I fought against everything to be with him. All my family turned their back on me. My parents were mad, uncles, aunts, friends, you name it, everyone was mad that I had made a stupid decision like that. We were only living together, and we had our first argument, he suggested we should think about living together twice ( I couldn't believe it! After all I had left and done for him). But, I ignored it. I wasn't going to give up that easily! So, then the second fight happened. He suggested the same things. I was so angry! I told him that one more time and I wasn't playing games! I really wanted to be with him, but if he didn't want to then OK. We were about to get married (nothing fancy, just city hall). Then we got into a huge argument, and he told me to leave. I was really tired of it!-- and humiliated. So, i got my stuff and left. He let me go, knowing that I had no where to go-- no money, no car! He practically did not care! He did not try looking for me. Actually, he only sent me an email saying that I had just lost the best thing of my life, and never worried about me again.

A couple of months have passed, and I found out from a friend, that he is asking if I am ok. Could it be regret? Could it be that his conscience is kicking in?

Of course, I would NEVER get back with him. All I want to know is WHY!?

Did he get cold feet!?

And, is he going to regret it?? Will he ever wonder what if?!

I just want to know what is inside his head.

Thanks,

--Twinkle
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Dear Twinkle,

Ronnie's Take:

I'm just speechless. You're an idiot to even care. I'm all about second and third chances, but, sooner or later, call a spade a spade. He is very unstable, and you need to just run and never ask about him again. Did you reread what you wrote? I'll recap-- he's a crackhead, but when he's not on crack we get along. He's on crack 80% of the time, but I love him. My god-- imagine having to raise a child with someone so unstable. Who cares if his unstability is in the good zone and missing you. Run what's in his head is he's an asshole!

--Ronnie
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Victor's Take:

You are going to look back in 10 years and realize this - him asking you to move out was the best thing that ever happened to you in your entire life.

Now, I would normally get into the relationship dynamics and why things aren't working out at this point. But, I cannot, and to do so would be futile. You lost me at, "He hit me."

Let me put this as simply as possible - unless a woman is robbing your house and has a gun or knife to your head threatening imminent danger, there is no reason EVER to hit a woman. The first time he hit you, you should have launched his fu**in' ass! But, hey - that's just me.

An acquaintance of mine, her name is Tracy, has a favorite saying - "No looking back; Spaceships don't come equipped with rearview mirrors."

Move forward, and aim for the stars my dear...

--Victor
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Eddie's Take:

The unfortunate thing is that you wasted so much time on this douche bag. Love is a complicated thing, and sometimes the ones that we dearly love are the ones that hurt us the most. However, I do feel that everything in our path of life is relevant. It may not make sense to you now, but one day you will understand the butterfly affect that this had on your life. Hopefully, you are in a much better place now, and you have closed that chapter of your life.

As far as what's on his mine, here's my take...

He has issues with wanting what he can't have. Before I say I had similar characteristics, let me clarify something for the readers--- I have never laid one finger on a woman. Just want to make sure that we are on the same page. However, I was a guy that pushed women away when they were getting too close. I used to be driven by the chase, and when a woman would leave me, I had to make sure that I could get her back. I know it is twisted, but that's how it used to be. It sounds like Mr. Douche has the same issues. Apparently, you were a big challenge (especially being in another country). So, he lured you back just to see if he could. Once he succeeded, the challenge was over.

So, good for you for moving on. May he live a miserable life. And, if he ever claims to have changed, do not ever take him back. He's violent, and he always will be.

Best of luck to you.

--Eddie
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