Dear Ask 3 Guys,

Okay, me and this guy have become close to each other but he lives in a different town, which is only like 15 minutes away. I want to hangout with him more, so he can get to know me more. I want a relationship, but I don't want to seem too desperate as in moving fast.....he told me straight up that he doesn't want to be friends, that he wants more, and I understand, but do I do? I really like this guy, but how do i get him to want me more. Like I said, I don't want to seem desperate, but I really like him, and he says he is totally different from any guy I have ever
met...its something I'm not used to-- being treated good... I want that chance with him to show him that i can be different from other girls that he has dated . HELP ME

--Confused Girl
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Dear Confused Girl,

Ronnie's Take:

Well, most good relationships take time to develop. Rushing in usually results in problems later. It's like a good bottle of wine or a fine dinner. You don't rush and finish. You take your time and enjoy it. That's part of the excitement, the anticipation of wanting more. Take your time, give some, then slow down some. You and him will enjoy it so much more. The best way I went about new relationships is fun with no expectations. This takes the guard down and allows everybody to be themselves. That's the best way for him to see the person you really are. No expectations-- show him you are independent, not desperate and happy with who you are. Guys love that. That's how I fell in love and now have a great relationship. Don't look desperate and needy, because it makes us run.

Ronnie
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Victor's Take:

First, I want you to take a deep breath, slow down, and relax!

You think you are on step 92 (out of 100) and you really are on step 7.

There is nothing that any of us are going to say here to make him like you more or to make it perfectly come together. There is no magic potion or pill he can take to make this work. Here is the best advice I can give you - be yourself. Don't force things, don't change to make him happy and most importantly don't think you can change him. You cannot change him. All you can do is be yourself and believe me - that is good enough! Friendships are important and many strong relationships start with good friendships, especially when we are younger which I know you are.

Be patient and be yourself.

I've said it once, I'll say it a thousand times - guys will come and go, your education and your family are with you forever. Make sure you are focusing on the important things also.

Good luck!

--Victor
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Eddie's Take:

It sounds like this guy is into you. Be content with that. Don't focus on the type of girl he wants, or what you can do to get him to like your more. Additionally, don't through yourself at him just to gain his interest. He may jump on the opportunity, but it may paint the wrong picture for him. Be confident, be sexy, and, most importantly, be you. All you can do is be genuine when you are around him. You know what the best part of that is? When you get into a relationship with him, you can still be yourself. If you fake it now, you'll have to fake it later, or hope he likes the real you when your true colors come out.

So, do whatever it is that makes you happy. Don't think you need to force yourself into a mold that you assume he likes. Tell him how you feel, and let the magic happen.

--Eddie
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